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Although we've always had glimpses of Pink's darker side before this
point in the album, "One of My Turns" gives us our first extensive view
of the present turmoil teeming beneath the surface of Pink's detached
persona while simultaneously shifting
the tone of the album. Up until now, the album is arguably dominated
by young Pink's naïvete as he grows (or at least tries to grow) into
the life handed to him at birth. Even the cynically didactic tones of
"In the Flesh?" and "the Thin Ice" are counterbalanced by a certain
paternal, instructional quality. Beneath the gravity of the previous
songs lurked a sense of exploring, of seeking self and searching for
one's place in the world no matter how misguided that search might be.
While songs like "What Shall We Do Now?" and "Young Lust" portray Pink
as exploring the physical pleasures of life, they portray searches nonetheless
that insinuate the desire to grow. Even the carnality of "Young Lust"
is embedded within a certain sexual innocence, a feeling of sensual
discovery and exploration. As we shall see, though, "One of My Turns"
is the brick wall, so to speak, against which the naïve explorations
of self and the world crash.
Following the young groupie's quasi-theatrical ramblings concerning
Pink's hotel room, Pink lapses into a trance-like state of personal
reflection sparked by the recognition of his wife's infidelity as well
as his inability to connect with the young girl he's brought to his
hotel. While the song's later lyrics are seemingly addressed to the
terrified fan, it is usually believed that Pink is mentally addressing
his wife in the song's
calm first half. In his 1979 interview with Roger Waters, interviewer
T. Vance described Pink at this stage of the album as a man who has
"got everything but nothing;" he's got the celebrity status that most
people can only dream of, adoring fans, expensive possessions, every
worldly object that he could desire. However he takes for granted what
should be the most important thing in his life, a personal connection
with his wife, the importance of which he only realizes once that love
has been taken away. Yet even then he is blind to his own accountability
in driving his wife to infidelity, instead turning his ire on what he
sees as the fickleness of love and life. Just as he sees everything
in his life, Pink views the very connection that could have been his
salvation as another personal betrayal, a relationship that decays and
ultimately causes mental distress which in turn contributes another
brick to the wall. For Pink, this decay is unavoidable: comparing the
degeneration of love to the decomposition of a "dying man" and other
natural processes (growing "older" and "colder") dispels any personal
blame that Pink might have felt. In his mind, everything in this world
will decay and at length cause more harm than good. These ideas of degeneration
are further implanted with the abundance of imagery concerning death
and violence; the grayness of love like a dying man's skin; aging and
becoming more inert, more unfeeling; comparing his feelings to a "razor
blade," a "tourniquet," and a "funeral drum." These last three similes
possibly act as allusions as well; the "razor blade" could very well
insinuate Pink's later turns to violence not only in the song but also
during his Hitler-esque phase (and quite possibly alludes to his near-suicide
in the song "the Final Cut"); the "tourniquet" suggests Pink's current
drug use as well as later injections ("Comfortably Numb") that cause
him to undergo another metamorphosis; finally, the mentioning of the
"funeral drum" foreshadows his metaphorical death as he retreats completely
behind his wall. Perfectly mirroring the transitory moment before Pink's
eruption, the tourniquet and funeral drum also carry with them the notions
of being stretched almost to the breaking point. A tourniquet is drawn
tight around a limb in order to hinder briefly the flow of blood through
an artery (possibly symbolizing the cessation of Pink's feelings and
emotions) while the head of a drum must be drawn tight in order for
sound to resonate throughout the hollow body (symbolizing Pink's shallow
persona). In both instances, the imagery of being stretched so tightly
prepares the audience for what must surely come soon: the breaking point.
Because of his own shallowness (which Pink does not recognize) and
the shallowness of the groupie (which he denunciates hypocritically),
Pink's emotional breakdown bursts into musical life after a stretching
crescendo. In an instant, he turns on the terrified groupie because
she represents the very superficial life that he had invested so
much in but that he simultaneously denies. Upon entering his hotel room,
the groupie is overcome by the room's size, the amount of guitars he
has lying around, concerning herself with his possessions rather than
with connecting with Pink on a personal level. Yet it is Pink who brought
the girl back to his room most likely with the intention of having sex
with her; it is Pink who bought all the guitars and expensive possessions;
it is Pink who invested his faith in the superficiality of the world,
in the list of things from "What Shall We Do Now?" However it is also
Pink who cannot resolve or possibly comprehend the duality of his own
character, his desire for love and a personal connection yet also his
desire for life's material and sensual pleasures. But rather than take
the blame and attempt to explicate his own persona, Pink blames his
wife in the first half of the song for his inability to connect through
love. Likewise, he blames the groupie in the song's second half for
his inability to completely satiate himself with the excesses of celebrity.
In both cases, he's really attacking himself and his own inadequacies
and his own beliefs without truly knowing it.
Once the dam has been broken the roiling undercurrent of emotion gushes
out. Yet the lyrics suggest that this isn't the first time Pink's emotions
have erupted, nor is it the last for it is "just a passing phase," insinuating
that it's happened before (see the interpretation of the guitar solo
in "Mother" for another of Pink's "turns"). From here, Pink cynically
addresses the groupie in a sarcastic response of sorts to her earlier
questions, this time asking her if she'd like to "watch TV, or get between
the sheets, or contemplate the silent freeways," covering a range of
possibilities that could be used to pass the time and feign a personal
connection. The lyrics are fairly self-explanatory though must be taken
with a grain of salt. Does Pink really have an ax in his suitcase? Does
he
really think he can fly? It must be remembered that these things are
sung in a specific context and so are most likely reflections of Pink's
instability and the emotions that come with that mental state. What
better way to show Pink's violent outburst and mental deterioration
than to have him calling for his "favorite ax," a statement that's both
unsettling and darkly humorous in its very absurdity. During the song,
Pink is almost completely out of his mind and so it becomes increasingly
difficult to separate narrative fact from fantasy, to separate the telling
of a chronological narrative from the poetic use of images and phrases
to suggest emotional states of mind. It is also interesting to note
that in rock terminology, an "ax" is a slang word for a guitar, creating
more ambiguity in Pink's lyrical ravings. However you personally interpret
the lyrics, whether literal or darkly humorous, there is little doubt
that Pink's relationship with the groupie ends just as all of his relationships
seemingly end, at least in his mind: Pink is left alone, alienated once
more from the world, a situation that lends itself to two different
renderings of the song's last line. By one theory, Pink is being heartfelt
when he shouts "why are you running away," hinting at both his obliviousness
as well as the inherent need to realize why every relationship in his
life ends with one outcome. Another view purports that the line is utterly
sarcastic with Pink deriding the departing groupie, cognizant of his
perpetual alienation and not surprised that yet another attempt at personal
connection has failed.
There
is little that needs to be said in terms of movie analysis considering
that the film basically follows the narrative of the song's lyrics with
the camera jostling through the scene as Pink destroys his hotel room
while the unprepared groupie hides in whatever nook or cranny she can
find. Steve Jasper wrote in and revealed that the television is playing
an old WWII movie called "The Dambusters." Jasper writes, "The Dambusters'
is essentially a biopic of Barnes Wallis, the bloke who designed the
bouncing bomb. This was dropped by bombers onto German reservoirs where
it bounced along the surface of the water and then slowly sank to the
bottom of the dam wall where it would explode, breaching the dam and
flooding the valley, causing all the factories to flood as well and
thus halt the German steel production necessary for the war effort.
In the Wall film, 'Dambusters' is on one of the channels on the telly
all the way through the sequence with the TV in it. It's a war film
all about blowing up walls." Quite fitting for "The Wall" though its
inclusion at this part in the movie is more ironic than reflective being
that Pink is still concerned with building rather than destroying his
own wall. Also note that Pink destroys the TV first before erupting
into the other rooms, possibly hinting at his subconscious repression
of anything that grows too painful, that reminds him of his bruised
past such as, in this incident, the death of his father. "The Dambusters'"
inclusion is made further ironic in that, if anything, Pink's latest
"turn" probably coupled with or sparked by the remembrance of his father
in WWII acts as a catalyst for his inner wall's culmination. If anything,
his "turn" causes him to regress behind his wall and continue building
at an alarming rate. In what might be yet another act of symbolic repression,
Pink ends the song in the film by throwing the television out of the
window
and screaming, "next time, fuckers," the very intonation of which hints
at his fractured world view in which he envisions all of society against
him. After all, every relationship he tries to produce eventually ends
with him being ostracized, or so it seems through the clouded, unseeing
eyes of our unbalanced protagonist.
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